Tag Archives: relationship

How to meet Jesus while vacuuming.

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I was writing this post the other day while I was vacuuming. I was writing in my head.

I had been rereading In His Steps, an old book that was the inspiration for the WWJD bracelets. In this 1897 novel, Charles Sheldon considers what would happen if a disciple of Jesus committed “to try to do what Jesus would probably do in the disciple’s place.”

While vacuuming I was considering whether Dallas Willard, was quoting from Sheldon. In a lecture at Wheaton College he said that being a disciple of Jesus means, “Learning from him how to do what he did, learning from him how to do what he said, by becoming like him. In being a disciple, I’m learning from Him to lead my life, as he would lead my life, if he were I” (10-31-01, Staley Lecture series).

And then, as I was comparing these two thoughts, I stopped the vacuum and picked up a small table to move it. I tilted the table slightly and one by one, the three pots containing cactus slid off the table and spread their planting soil and plants on the carpet.

My first thought was not to ask what Jesus would do at that moment, if he were a husband who had dumped three cacti on the carpet.

My first thought was much different.

Nancy, on the other hand, immediately said, “Don’t worry about it. I’ve done that too. Just relax.”

I eventually did relax. And realized that she had done exactly what Jesus would do if he were a wife whose husband had dumped three cactus on the carpet. He would have cared more about the husband than the carpet. And he would have repotted the plants. And he would have left some dirt for me to vacuum.

Just like Nancy.

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How to answer a simple question.

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I work at a church. Every Sunday morning, I know that someone will ask me how I’m doing. I know that someone will say, “How was your week.” And I will not know how to answer the questions.

So I decided to figure out how to have an answer.

1. Don’t think, “I wonder why they are asking. I better answer well. They are paying part of my salary.” And get tongue-tied.

2. Don’t think, “Great. They are asking me, I need to ask them, and then we’ll be talking for an hour. And I have to fix the projector.”

3. Every Sunday morning, when you are driving to church, remember that someone will ask you these questions. There is no excuse for being surprised. (If they ask, “why did you drive backwards through the softball field last night,” you can be surprised.)

4. Every Sunday morning, think through the names of the people that you are likely to see. That way you won’t be scrambling to remember. And it’s possible that the review session will give you something to ask first: “How are you feeling after the Boston Marathon?” (Hi bib #13577).

5. Be honest with the person who is asking, letting them know that the reason you keep edging away from them is that you are getting toilet paper for the three empty stalls upstairs.

6. Be honest with yourself that you aren’t nearly as busy at this moment as you would like to believe that you are.

7. Stop rushing for fifteen seconds and look in the asker’s eyes. You’ll find out whether the next sentence is going to be “great” or is going to be “my mother has Alzheimer’s.”

8. Remember that touching, talking, listening, stopping, and speaking truth were all ways that Jesus got involved in the lives of people. People just like me.

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just one picture, please

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Philip was a normal guy.

After Jesus invited Philip to follow him, Philip went to find his friend Nathaniel. Rather than talking about his own understanding of Jesus, Philip rooted his invitation to his friend in theology:  ”This is the one Moses and the prophets pointed to.”  When Nathaniel argued, Philip merely said, “Come and see.”

When faced with a crowd of people needing food, Jesus asked Philip where they could buy it. Philip responded, “Eight months wages wouldn’t buy enough for each one to have a bite of bread.”

When someone comes to Philip and asks to be taken to Jesus, Philip goes to find Andrew. Together they go.

Philip seems to be the kind of person that doesn’t demand much, that doesn’t lead much, that doesn’t expect much.

I’m not being critical when I say that. There are way more Philip people than there are Peter people (loud, intense) or John people (working right alongside Peter and Jesus). Philip people quietly do their work. Philip people don’t worry a lot about theology, don’t get into the big arguments, don’t remember all the footnotes.

So when Jesus says,

“If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”

Philip replies with:

“Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.”

Philip’s request makes sense. Many of us travel long distances for an autograph from a famous person, for having our picture taken with the band. Philip would be happy with the glimpse of God that Moses got. Philip would be happy with once, simply, clearly, a view of God.

For Jesus, that request is a frustration. He just said that seeing him is seeing the Father. God offers supper conversations, not merely snapshots.

too many words about

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You know what I’d love to give you? Some silence. I’d love to give you some time to stop and think and be still.

I’d love to give me that, too.

You are probably better than I am at stopping. Me? When I sit down to be still, it allows me to remember the things that aren’t done. It allows me to think about what I could be doing with this time. It allows me to fill the time with chatter. Or with clutter. Or with activity.

I wonder if part of the problem with the way I try to be still. I try to concentrate. I try to be quiet. I try to stop, so that maybe I can hear God and hear myself.

Here’s what’s interesting, however. When I decide to spend time with Nancy, I don’t talk about the need to be still.  I don’t berate myself for my incapacity for not being with her. I don’t spend time not with her thinking I should be with her.

I go find her.

If I am having a hard time concentrating, I tell her. (And when I do, it usually comes as no surprise to her.) And I may ask her to help me remember something. And I may say, “can we walk and talk?” And I may say, “I’ll be back in 5 minutes.”

So here’s what I’m thinking. I’m thinking that maybe I should stop worrying so much about emptying my head and start working more on listening to and for Jesus. In the words of other people. In the words written for us by John and Matthew and others.

Maybe if I thought more about conversation with Him and less about being silent first, just like Nancy does, He would help with both.

Happy weekend, friends.

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Related post: A question of stopping

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How was your day?

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Recently, I talked to a young woman about God. Among other things, we talked about talking to God. At times, she said, she felt like she was talking to air.

How would you talk differently if you could see him, I asked.

“I’d ask how his day was,” she blurted out.

When we talk with people we see, we converse. We ask how their day was. We ask how they are feeling. We ask questions and listen to the answers. We take turns. We don’t talk just about ourselves. We don’t spend all our time making the other person talk about us, about what they want us to do, about what they want us to learn, about what they expect from us.

Well, I suppose we do actually do those things with some people. With people who are our counselors, we talk about ourselves, and in the process are directed to areas to celebrate and areas to work on.

But we don’t view those interactions as conversations.

With people who are our teachers, we do listen for instructions and goals and expectations.

But we don’t view those interactions as conversations.

With people who are friends or more, however, we exchange feelings and dreams and frustrations. We expect that the relationship will last longer than a series of sessions or a semester.

A couple weeks ago, out walking with the dog, I had asked God the very question she suggested. I asked him how his day had been. I laughed at myself. And then I listened.

I realized that by asking God to talk about himself, I moved myself out of the middle of the universe, or at least, my universe.

“But his day is always perfect.” My young friend laughed.

Even a perfect day is made better by sharing it.