Saturday reflection: Row E, Seat 2

January 22, Hope, Nancy and I went to hear Donald Miller for the first time. We know him well, as well as you can know someone from the books he’s written, and the posts and the tweets. But we hadn’t heard him. Nancy and I drove the two hours to Mishawaka, Indiana, picked up Hope and drove the two hours on to Wheaton. Afterward, we dropped Hope hack at school and came home. It was a long Sunday.

Nancy talked about the presentation itself quite well. Hope talked about it in the context of her day and life. So what did I learn? Most of it I won’t list. You’ll hear it over the next decades. But I wanted to tell you a few things I learned, mostly about speaking.

1. I confess. I’m a Don Miller fan. (But he helped me write my dad’s eulogy). Before the event, I went for an autograph. There was an informal line. And when the people in front of us moved down the aisle, Don walked up, put out his hand, and said, “Hi. My name is Don.”

Lesson: Don’t hide, preparing for a performance. Walk around, preparing for a conversation. 

2. Jerry Root hosted the evening. After Jerry introduced Don to us, he introduced the college audience to Don. “This is the community where I live. These are the people that I love.” I quit taking notes then, overwhelmed by the idea of being rooted in community, of building a bridge that way.

Lesson: An audience is a family. Or can be. If you love them.  When you are introducing, make the speaker pay attention to the people. 

3. Don started with stories we already knew, Nancy and I, from A Million Miles. We were afraid that we’d come all this way for reruns. But the laughter said that many people hadn’t heard them Or loved to hear them again.

Lesson: Repeating stories is important. It orients the curious. It reaffirms the faithful. 

4. I probably never sat in Row E, Seat 2 before Sunday night. I did spend 30 minutes many weekday mornings for three years sitting in seats close to that seat. Unless I was late.

I’m a Wheaton grad (80). We had required chapel and we met in that room. On the drive home, it was easy to think, “Have I done anything of value in the last thirty years? Have I told the story that I could have told?” And then I laughed at the danger of the question.

In Row E, Seat 3 sat Nancy. We’ve been married for nearly 29 years. Three children, one buried. Job gains and loses, career changes, moves. Shared bed and board and many months of accumulated conversation. We have changed each other.

In Row E, Seat 1 sat Hope. I held her first almost 21 years ago, noticed her months before that. She has challenged us, blessed us, taught us how to be parents of a daughter.

And so, driving through the night to take my favorite two women home, I smiled, grateful for the story I’m in the middle of.

Lesson: when looking for new stories, don’t forget the one you are in the middle of. It may be the most important one you could find. 

My review of A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.

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creative.

Grab a generic black bird. Take a one-inch wide paint brush and a small bottle of white paint. Paint one white stripe across its back, about two inches from the end of the tail. Open a pint can of red paint, closer to crimson than maroon. Wrap some masking tape around the bird’s beak. Dip the bird head first in the red paint, to the line where it twists its neck. Quickly wipe its eyes. Set it up on a tree branch to dry.

Grab another generic black bird. Look for one a little smaller, a little rounder than the first. Take a small bowl, the kind you use for custard. Pour some of the white paint into the bowl. Dip the bird, feet first, into the paint. Like dipping molasses cookie balls into the sugar. Set it on the ground to dry.

Grab another generic black bird. Take another one-inch wide paint brush and the red paint. Dip the brush into the paint. Tickle the bird, under the wing. When the wing opens a bit, right where it attaches to the body, paint a small red patch. Put it on a cattail to dry.

Grab another generic black bird. Mix a little blue paint into the red paint. Add some black paint. Try for a midnight purple. Mask the beak of the bird. Dip the head of the bird into the paint, up to its shoulders. Put it anywhere to dry.

Grab another generic black bird, a little smaller than the last one. Using the rest of the midnight purple paint, pour it over the whole bird. Put it on a birdhouse next to a big open field with lots of mosquitos.

The woodpecker, junko, red-wing blackbird, grackle and martin will be grateful to their Creator for creative differences.

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I believe in the forgiveness of sins.

As I sat down to write about the next part of the creed, I realized that I have talked about sin and forgiveness of sin a lot.

  • I wrote about Jesus and a sinner, a woman from a different culture and life than Jesus.
  • I wrote about the hard work of repenting, the process of turning around, of rebuilding relationship.
  • I wrote about Good Friday and the forgiveness in the middle of excruciating pain  I wrote about the same thing in Like God.
  • I wrote about Patrick’s forgiveness in going to Ireland, the land where he had been held captive (About the saint in Patrick).
  • I wrote about five ways that David journaled his prayer, including asking for forgiveness.
  • I wrote about the importance of personally acknowledging my sin (I did it).
  • I wrote about the Mary who poured perfume on the feet of Jesus (It’s okay to not know everything) in gratitude.
  • I wrote a whole series on the part of Matthew 18 where Jesus talks about how to handle sin in the context of church. (It’s here in one document: Matthew 18)

As I looked through these posts I see that apparently I believe in sin. That’s the first part of this clause. In order to believe in the forgiveness of sin, there has to be something to forgive, there has to be something more than a mistake, a slip up, an error. We’ve got to see that there is something that was wrong.

And then that there is someone that was wronged. someone who deserved right.

And then that the person wronged has the capacity to forgive.

And then that the person wronging asks for forgiveness.

It’s not complicated, this forgiveness of sin I believe it. But it’s often quite hard. Because it means I’m the one who wrongs.

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I’m tired of long sentences and parentheses about church

(part of the Creed series)

Every time I say “church”, I feel like I have to explain.

By church, I never mean “church service” or “worship service” or “worship gathering” or “Sunday morning service” or even Saturday evening service. Those events are important. They allow us to listen, to sing together louder than we can sing alone, to have our private spiritual space invaded. They force us (or give us the opportunity) to give greetings and hugs, to share tears and frustrations, to be confronted with people that we don’t like and may have treated us rudely when we visited their store this week, but who are just as much in need of grace and healing as we are. But going to church services isn’t church.

By church, I never mean “church building” or “school building we are renting until we can get a real church” or “don’t run in the building because it is God’s house” I never mean “the  place that spent too much on glass and chandeliers when people are starving” or “the place that ignores the fact that God created us with eyes and some of us with an aesthetic sense that is affronted.”

Places have value. Humans are created in time and space. Spaces take on meaning for us. Having a building makes it possible to share it for blood drives and immunizations and kids basketball and weddings and funerals and a week’s worth of activity. But going to the building isn’t church.

When I say “I believe in the holy Church“, I mean the church being made holy. I mean the people who have decided that they, imperfect as they are, will follow Jesus and will do it in community, as imperfect as it is, with the rest of the people who have decided that they will follow Jesus.

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I believe in the Holy Spirit

(Part of the Creed series)

My friend messed up his marriage. He’s trying to clean things up. He wanted to help at church in a public way. His wife said it made her very uncomfortable. He wanted to know what to do, since helping at church is a good thing, right?

I said, “Imagine you and your wife were working in the kitchen together. Somehow, you cut her hand, pretty seriously. As the cut is just starting to heal, imagine walking over and poking your finger into the cut.” I said, “That’s what you’d be doing.” We both flinched. He understood.

I believe in the Holy Spirit.

I didn’t want to apply for the job. I was an obvious candidate, but I didn’t want to apply. “Nope, I never want to sit in that chair.” One day, walking through the building, after saying again “Nope, I don’t want to,” I thought “I don’t get to tell God that.” Later, I started writing an application letter to the search committee, explaining. Mid-paragraph, the committee chair walked in.

I believe in the Holy Spirit.

I didn’t get the job.

I believe in the Holy Spirit.

I sat next to the little coffin. As I waited, I was aware of a feeling in my chest. I know the feeling of butterflies, the anxiousness before speaking, before performance, before importance. I know that feeling well. This was the opposite. Not deadness, but a living, moving peace.

I believe in the Holy Spirit

Jesus was talking to the disciples, the eleven: “The Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you.”

I believe in the Holy Spirit.

I don’t understand. I can’t explain. But I believe. How could I not?

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the one who decides.

(We are going back to the creed. Here’s what we’ve written so far.)

Most of us think judgment should exist. We want an end to gang violence and justice for families wrecked by meth manufacturers. We want an end to child trafficking and justice for those who buy and sell children like property. We want an end to brutal dictators and corporate theft and people who take our place in line.

We want just justice. We want fair judges to make the decisions, people who won’t yield to special interests or political expediency, people who will decide on the merits of the case, people who won’t allow the guilty to slide by on a technicality.

We want merciful justice. We want mercy involved in judging so there is protection for people who didn’t know any better, who were seduced against their will, who didn’t understand anything. We want someone judging who understands how complicated it is to be human, with weak wills and confusing choices.

The creed talks about judging. We read in the creed From [the right hand of the Father] he [Jesus] shall come to judge the living and the dead. The room divides. The ones who think they’re right. The ones who feel judged by the ones they believe think they are right.

When the room divides, some linger. They know that the date of judgment isn’t in the creed, nor is there any detail when the day is.  They don’t try to figure out rapture and tribulation, Lake of Fire, Armageddon.

Instead, we say we believe that the person who was the only-begotten son of God, who was born miraculously, lived, died, rose again, ascended and is sitting next to God the Father is going to come and judge us.  Who understands abuse and underdogs. Who knows both human and divine. A judge who could be just. And merciful.

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Saturday reflection: Rich and Becky Dixon

We talked about Rich’s Ride several months ago here at 300. (Rich Dixon Rolls) Rich Dixon is a regular participant in conversations here.

This week, Rich and Becky talked about the ride for awhile at their church, Timberline Church. 

Here’s Rich’s post with a link to their conversation. It takes about 45 minutes. It’s worth watching this weekend.

And congratulations Rich.

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Permission to sleep.

I’ve been looking in the archives to see if I’ve ever told you this story. I don’t think I have. Not here anyway. I’m sorry. Because it’s about the one time in my 53 years I heard God talk with words.

Back in the old days, back before Social Media, I was at the end of a long week. I was doing my usual work as an associate pastor, I had a couple tough situations, and I did a wedding. Friday night we had a long (and wonderful) rehearsal where I talked with the couple about the connections between communion and first-century Jewish wedding customs. On Saturday, I performed the wedding. And Saturday night, I was getting ready to teach a class the following morning.

I was exhausted in every possible way. I wasn’t ready to teach. But I knew that it wasn’t because I had procrastinated. Finally, after dozing at the computer at midnight, I gave up and headed to bed.  Like Andrew, Hope and Nancy had already done.

Outlines

Our house is a split level. To get from the office to the bedroom, you climb six steps to the living room level, then seven steps to the bedroom level.  I turned off the lights downstairs and climbed the first flight. As I turned to go up the next flight I hear, “It’s okay son. Go to sleep.”

I heard it. Whether loud enough for others to hear, or only inside my head, I don’t know. But I heard it.

I went to bed. I went to sleep. And teaching went very well the next morning.

Others have heard more exciting things in their one time hearing God’s voice. But when I think about my approach to talking with people, I think I heard right.

Have a good weekend. Sleep well.

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I don’t know a good book.

I’m not a good curator. (I am a curate, in the old sense of the word. I care for souls.)

But I finally realized recently that what I am not is a curator. People often ask me about books. “Have you read a good book on this? Do you know a good book about that?” And I hardly ever know how to answer. I often point them to something I’ve written, or I offer to write something. But I don’t much read books for sharing.

My friend Todd is a curator, both modeling it and teaching itA curator gathers the best specimens, the representative samples. A curator is a librarian, building a collection and making it available and pointing people to the best places. A curator points us in the direction of the best sources.

I’m not really a translator, either. Translators work precisely, trying to take something in one language and express it clearly and accurately in another. A Bible translator looks at the Greek and puts it in the language that people are speaking, in their heart language.

And though I am creative, I am not a creative. Creatives make something out of debris and pieces. But they aren’t so much worried about making us understand something as understanding themselves.

What I am is an interpreter. I explain. I explore. I find metaphors that illustrate the idea. I sit and listen to a story, to your heart, to God. And then I try to take us into that listening.

But I need curators. And translators. And creatives. I need the people who are finding the great sources. I need the people who are making sure that words are turned into other words accurately. I need people who make stuff up, who delight us.

So use your gift.

This is an exploration of ideas found in Not the Same

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Passing on wisdom.

A couple weeks ago I looked at a younger friend and told him he was doing well. Last week I started working with an intern, showing her how I approach video as storytelling. Last week I encouraged another younger friend to explore a new way of thinking about career.

I do these things because they were done for me at crucial turning points. I know how much the words of people with experience helped me. Cliff and Reid and Charles gave me hope.

It’s a long tradition, hope-giving.

Peter was the loud one of the closest followers of Jesus. And ended up as the first leader of the group. Peter wrote a couple of letters to people he wanted to encourage. Toward the end of the first one, 1 Peter, he starts talking to leaders, elders he calls them. “Fellow elders,” he says, identifying with them though he had the right of first among equals. And as he talks to these leaders, he tells them about being shepherds. His words suggest he is talking about shepherding people the way he learned about shepherding people–from shepherd Jesus.

Then Peter gives his autobiography:

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.

Peter’s not offering a pep talk. He’s describing the night that Jesus told him, “You are going to be tested. But I’m praying for you. You are going to turn away from me. But when you turn back, be one that strengthens others. ” And he was (tested). And he did (turn away). And he was (brought back). And he is (strengthening others).

Even after the cock crowed, Peter was restored by Jesus.

There’s hope for us, too.

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