I can’t run as fast as you.

15Sep
by Jon Swanson

I have spent my life trying to keep up.

I read about people who are doing wonderful things and I have tried to learn their secrets, to follow their example. I have been astonished at the capacity of others, the skill of others, the travels of others.

I listen as friends recount travelogues and when they turn to me and say, “so where did you go this week,” I can’t offer anything much more exciting than “Grabill.”

I can’t be too critical. I have done my share of listing how many projects I’m working on.  But for the past month, at every turn, I have been nudged that I can no longer make my goal to be as busy or as successful or as humble or as faithful as anyone else.

Yesterday morning, I was reading about Paul’s desire above everything to know Christ. He talks about it in Philippians 3, in some writing about his wonderful religious credentials. He talks about his scholarship and his nationality and his personal drive and then he says,

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ

Lots of Christians have turned that into a test of whether they-or others-are measuring up spiritually.

But I don’t think it’s a statement about measuring up. I think Paul is saying, “I know you think I could be doing something worthwhile. I could be doing something successful instead of sitting in this jail cell because I’m saying what the religious leaders and the authorities don’t like.  But I saw him, at least a glimpse. And I talk to him. And every little bit I understand, I want to understand a bit more.”

Paul’s not offering proof, he’s explaining passion.

I want that, too.

So I’m going stop trying to keep up.

5 thoughts on “I can’t run as fast as you.”

  2. Sara's avatar

    Sara

    Thank you for your words. Your post inspires me to share a story.

    In high school I was on the field hockey team, a demanding sport that requires lots of running. I made it through the year and then quit. The following year I wrote a school paper called “I Also Ran.” It described my experience with running, how impossible it seemed and humiliating.

    Last year I gave it one last shot to exercise regularly, and as of today I’ve been running daily for a year, a month and a day. I did my first 5k last year.

    I am not all that I could be yet. Your post is a reminder while I may not be able to keep up, I can keep running.

    Like

  3. Chris Brogan's avatar

    Chris Brogan

    I can’t slow down.

    There’s this comic. It turns out to be really lame, and it was colored at this time when comic publishers thought we didn’t care about the quality of a comic. And it features a bunch of really lame characters. But here’s what happened.

    Quicksilver is Marvel’s answer to the Flash, only he’s a real jerk, and he’s evidently got the hots for his sister. But that’s not the story. The story is this.

    Someone says to him something along the lines of, “Quicksilver, why are you such an ass all the time?”

    He says: “Have you ever had to run in to the grocery store for just one thing, and you get it and quickly bring it to the cashier, only there’s an old person in front of you who can’t figure out how to pay using her debit card and you’re stuck there just waiting and waiting and waiting? That’s what life is like for me all the time.”

    So, as the fastest guy alive (in the Marvel comics world), his BRAIN works all the time and it’s too fast and it’s no good.

    I once sat across from a really brilliant guy, and as I was trying to keep up my half of the conversation, I realized a look that I knew all too well. He made the “I feel like I’m trying to explain this to my dog look.” I was too slow to figure out what he was saying and he caught me at it.

    My head goes way too fast. Time feels way too slow in comparison. My patience isn’t always all that and a bag of chips. I make very big and grievous mistakes because of how fast my head goes.

    There’s a lot of value in slow.

    Like

    1. Jon Swanson's avatar

      Jon Swanson

      I’m starting to realize that if everyone is on the merry-go-round, someone has to be standing on the ground to hand them Dramamine. If everyone is running the marathon, someone has to be at the help stations with cold water.

      Like

  4. Joseph Ruiz's avatar

    Joseph Ruiz

    I for one am so glad you are in Grabill if that is what it takes to produce the insights you turn out every day (well almost every day) Meeting you through SOBCON has truly been one of the significant benefits.

    This post in particular resonates. You are often able to put into words what I feel but don’t seem to be able to articulate. Thank you for your words all 300 of them. Thanks for being a servant.

    For what it is worth you give “daily” a whole new meaning for me.

    It doesn’t quite seem like enough, but Thank you.
    Grace and Peace
    Joe

    Like

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