Jesus was concerned about little children. He said that the road to greatness in the kingdom of heaven ran closer to the playground than the temple courts. And then, after telling the disciples to learn from children, Jesus got graphic:

“If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin,” Jesus says, “it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”

We are tempted to say, “Better than what, Jesus?” But if that is the good news, I don’t want to know the bad news. Instead, it is worth thinking about how to avoid the punishment altogether.

I thought about why Jesus would choose a millstone.

The obvious reason is the weight. I wonder, however, if he was thinking about the slow oppressive grinding that happens with our children sometimes. We push and push and push until they get angry. We live with such a difference between how we are in public and how we are at home that they abandon faith as mere hypocrisy, or worse. We are too lazy to help the small seeds of faith grow with encouragement and coaching, and they struggle to survive when faced with serious challenges.

Jesus looks at the result of faith corrupted or abandoned and says, “you wore them out by being a millstone, grinding away. Now wear the millstone.”

But it doesn’t have to be that way. That’s why Jesus makes the point.

Start with the faith they have. Help it grow. Answer their questions. When you can’t, look it up. When they aggravate, show them how to respond well. When they struggle, love them. When they fail, hold them–and then teach them how to learn from God and others.