The warnings in the news are about the elderly. The age break is 60. After 37 years of marriage (and a few years of life before we got married) apparently we’re elderly.

And so, as part of an elderly married couple, this word. We’re still figuring it out, too.

We haven’t figured out how to be happy all the time, how to sleep through the night, how to not worry about our kids, how to vacation consistently, how to have a date night every week. We haven’t figured out the best church, how to be as spiritual as we’re supposed to be. We are convinced we’ll never measure up to the cool kids, and we’ve never figured out how to completely let go of not being with the cool kids. We haven’t figured out how to let go of our insecurities, how to just stop. We haven’t figured out letting go of comparison, letting go of that fear of what people will think. And, to be honest, what you will think.

But here’s the thing. We’re completely committed to keep figuring it out together.

And we’re grateful that through disappointment and (mild) disagreement and deep loss, we have been together.

And I think that’s the word from this elderly married couple to you young folks, the thing we’re figuring out. The secret isn’t figuring it out. The secret is together.