>As I told him of a project I said “Yes” to, my friend had a great question. “What are you going to stop doing?”
“Worrying”, I said.
“Didn’t you give that up for Lent,” he said.
I went back to looking at the road. Apparently, Lent didn’t last. And I didn’t have the willingness to say, “and I want to give the fringe time I spend on Facebook and Twitter.” Because I realized that time was also tied up in worry.
On one hand there’s worry of missing something, the worry of what might be happening without me. On the other hand, I often deal with anxiety by distracting myself rather than doing the work.
And, as I mentioned a couple weeks ago, there is anxiety around performance, being good enough. I said then that we could be asking ourselves how we can be helpful rather than good enough. With each new project I add, there is another opportunity to worry about performance.
What if I look at each of the projects in front of me as opportunities to be helpful, to be harvesting the experiences and relationships and abilities I have?
What if I remember that Lent never lasts without tending. We are invited to keep to unpack our habits and their triggers and to redirect our trust. We are invited to return to our commitments and renew them.
As I said to friends on Sunday, God’s interested in direction more than perfection. Like younger sons we head toward him and his goodness envelops us. Like Jesus reminded the crowds, “Come to me and I’ll give you rest.”
If I’m “unsocial” you’ll understand, I hope. I’m learning to worry less and help more.