God.

We wonder all the time why things happen.

Mostly, we wonder why bad things happen.

Good things like flowers happen, and we are glad. We seldom wonder what we did to deserve them. We often think we worked to earn them.

But bad things, like pandemics and accidents and heart illness and cancer and job loss, those things we wonder about.
We wonder what we did wrong.
We wonder what you are doing wrong.

We wonder what you might want
in order to do what we want.
A barter of good living for good health?
A promise of right living for a right outcome?

Peter says, “Jesus was doing great stuff and died for doing right.”
I’ll be honest, God, that’s not helpful.
But he – you – didn’t stay dead.

And is – you are – a shepherd.
Looking for us in order to heal our broken hearts.
Leading us in order to heal our broken bodies.
Bringing us together in order to heal our broken souls.

Good Shepherd, even though we will still have questions until we die, we want to know that you know. We want to have life to the full. We want to be led to green pastures. We want our souls restored.

Though we say we want lots of other things, we’re pretty sure we want you.
If you’ll have us.
And you say you will.

Not through our work,
but through Christ our Lord,

Amen.

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Reflecting on Psalm 23 and 1 Peter 2:19-25. Published in God. We Still Need You: A Year of Pandemic Prayer and Practice From a Hospital Chaplain.